Writing is a Noun, Not a Verb

I told you a little about my personal story last week.
 
This week, I'm going to tell you just a little more so you can understand identity.

For some of us, writing is not just a verb, which is something we do.  For a very few of us it's a noun—a thing—an identity we must embrace.

Wide-eyed and wonder-filled

As far as I can remember, stories and poetry have always lived inside of me.  The moment I learned how to release words on the page, I did.
   
At the ready age of 9 or 10 I was actually writing, illustrating and binding my own children's books out of printer paper and manila folders.  And I still have those books somewhere...

I also still have stacks of spiral notebooks of poetry—horrible, simplistic poetry—from the heart of child who thought the world revolved around rhymes and roses.

Not that rhyming or rose poems are bad.

During my teen years, the only thing I knew for certain was that I had to keep writing no matter what.  I didn't know any other way to express myself or my creativity.  

And write I did despite the fact that no one understood me.  Writing released my emotions in such a positive way counseling never could.

Reality packs a punch

Then I stepped into grown-up world of pursuing a career in college.  Reality hit me like a hard punch in the gut.  

The harsh voice in my head insisted that I put away childhood fantasies and look logic dead in the face.

Sadly, towards the end of college life, I chose practical over passion. 

It wasn't an easy choice.  However, teaching guaranteed the rent would be paid.

When college life came to a close, so did my outlet.  So did my dream.

Even still, for years, I continued to write here and there just for fun.  However, I was writing less and less.  Gradually, the words diminished as did my motivation to release them on the page.

Eventually, I buried my talent in the ground.  For twelve years.  

Then there was nothing but struggling and silence.




Something was missing

My biggest problem was that I was not fully embracing who I was meant to be—my identity as a writer.  I didn’t know my full purpose in life.  I excused myself from my calling due to my other daily obligations—school work , job, family.

Because I knew something was missing, I searched for ways to fill the void.  I volunteered at church, changed careers several times, and even started a family.  Even though many of these things brought me joy, still something wasn’t quite right.

Embracing my identity

After shelving my dream for so many years, I finally turned a corner.

I discovered a conference called the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers' Conference.  A conference is like going to a really intense school for a few days to learn about writing and connect with other writers, agents, and editors. 

I had also read a book that confirmed who I was as a writer:  Story Trumps Structure by Steven James, my all time writing hero.

As soon as I began connecting with other writers like me and learning to improve my craft, something happened.


The dam burst.

A geyser of dormant ideas laced with passion blew open.  Stories started dancing within me.  Poetry began singing to me in quiet times of reflection.  Words demanded to be released.  Daily.

Recently, I’ve made a choice, promising myself that despite the cost, I will never, ever look back. 

Now I’m running with it because I am a writer.  

Because of my experience, I am here to help you find it and embrace it as well.

It’s your turn

Tell me below a little bit about yourself. 

How do you feel about yourself as a writer?  What do you like to write?  Who are your writing heroes (favorite authors)?  What is your biggest writing dream?